This morning I read an article in O magazine (I confess, I do read Vogue, In Style etc.) and I thought I would share some new information with my female readers. Anyone who follows this blog knows that it’s almost entirely devoted to books about gay men and the culture around it, but today I’m going to switch topics and embrace the woman in me. So guys, you don’t need to read any further.
The article referred to above is about a New York City “medspa” (I never even knew they existed) which is run by a gynecologist and among other things, the spa promotes “pelvic fitness”. So far so good! However, here is where I admit my total ignorance of what’s going on in the world of the va jay jay. Did you know that “your face is not the only area that loses volume with age and gets wrinkly”? Are you aware that in the age of the “Brazilian” which allows some of us to wear those barely there bikinis, some flaws in our outward physical appearance are now apparent?
Which brings me to the purpose of this post. There is apparently a procedure called labiaplasty, an operation to “re-contour” the inner labia to address asymmetry – I kid you not!! Apparently 4,500 such procedures were performed in the US last year – not a whole lot compared to breast augmentations (400,000) and liposuctions (450,000) but enough to make the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecologists sit up and take notice. One plastic surgeon who performs 20 such procedures a year claims that labiaplasty, or reshaping, can relieve physical discomfort caused by chafing. He also said that “now that more women are taking off their public hair they’re seeing things they didn’t used to”. Ouch!
Why am I sharing this information, you ask? Should you consider rejuvenating your va jay jay? *g* Should you think of this as redecorating in the same way as you would redecorate your home? Or, should you limit yourself to Kegels and discount any newfangled *improvements*? I thought I would at least bring this information to the attention of those of you who are considering a Brazilian, about the possible negative effects of letting it all hang out 🙂 Hey, I’m just trying to give you options!
Happy US Thanksgiving.
Um, if I’m going to rejuvenate anything, I can think of about 10 things on my body I would spend the money on before that. I’ve never really looked that closely though, perhaps its better I don’t. I don’t think even if I was obscenely rich I would. I don’t know, guess I’d have to have a look and see if it needs upgraded. Now I am sure there are women out there with physical differences, maybe one side is like really different than the other and its embarrassing or causes chafing or something and its great that for those women with serious issues it can be take care of, but just to make it look “younger”? Umm, not gonna happen here. The post-op discomfort must be unreal. How do you sit with stitches down there? I’ve had a baby, why would I want to do that again?
I wonder if men can get a scrotal lift when things start to hang a little low?
I am NOT going to get plastic surgery on my cooter. First of all…owwie. Second, it’s not going to taste any different, so what’s the point?
Tam
This post was tongue in cheek but you have given me an idea for my next post *g*
I was not suggesting that women should do anything to *beautify* their va jay jay – I was just amazed that there was such a procedure! It boggles my mind what women (and men) do in the name of “beauty”. The cost of such a procedure would probably keep me in books for years.
Oh..and the flower pic? Is why I stopped reading most het. I was going to bounce the next author who referred to ‘dew drenched petals’, or any variation thereof, off a tall building
Emmy
I never considered taste! Oh my. I knew somehow you would come up with a new angle *g*
Btw “cooter”? Is that word in the Concise Oxford Dictionary or Wikipedia?
Some people have way too much time on their hands – by that I mean the people having such things done to their wotsits – not Wave for posting about it.
There have been programmes about this on UK television that would make you squirm in your seat. I’m squirming just thinking about them. Where they follow this operation/or similar in all it’s detail. Not something you want to stumble onto whilst channel hopping. (Though I have done!)
I think in some cases similar surgery is medically necessary. But just to make it look pretty? Hate to sound selfish but as I’m never going to have to look at it that closely, I don’t think I’ll bother. 🙂
I heard of the procedure and I am not surprised because don’t they have one to make the penis bigger?
I find it said that women would want to go that far and spend money on more impotant things.
Emmy
Was there dew on the petals? What about the little clit in the flower? I searched a long time for something that even came close (other than the color) *g*
Lesley
I had no idea about this!
Some people have way too much time on their hands – by that I mean the people having such things done to their wotsits
I suppose if a woman was in the porn business or a regular actress who was fond of taking off her clothes in movies, there may be a need for something along these lines if there was significant “asymmetry”. But apparently regular women are having this *procedure* done.
Are you saying that one can watch the procedure on TV in Britain? Who would want to?
KB
I don’t think there is surgery that actually makes the penis bigger (not that I know of anyway – although many men have parted with their money to make “little Johnnie” bigger, because hope springs eternal). But as I said in the post, I’m just amazed that there is such a procedure, and that regular women are having it done apparently!
Wave: There is also a surgery to make you a virgin again, where they sew you up so you feel like you have a hymen. O_O
Hi KB
I knew about that one – the surgery is done mostly in countries like Iran, India etc., where a girl’s virginity is prized and she could be killed for lying about it. I wonder how the women determine whether the guys they’re marrying are also virgins and is there a penalty for them too? *g*
Actually I think there is a surgery to make the penis longer, they snip it waaay at the back where its attached to your body so that it moves forward and thus is longer. But I’m not sure how that works exactly. LOL Not something I’ve ever looked into. And no way do I want to watch someone’s nether region surgery on cable. Ewwww.
Ha! There is plastic surgery for men, phalloplasty, for length AND girth, this lovely site explains it and actually gives the average penis size by country. http://www.drgiunta.com/penis-enlargement-surgery.html Seems France is biggest overall and can you believe this? I’m sitting in a hotel in France as I type this, all alone in a king size bed. I better hit the streets before I leave tomorrow. LOL My chance to experience the biggest the world has to offer it seems. 😉
Holy cow!
I don’t know what to say.
Speaking of Brazil, they have an interesting procedure men and women sign up for: anal bleaching. It lightens the dark color of your rosebud to make it more aesthetically pleasing. I kid you not. Never mind that you can’t see it yourself.
Wow, this has just been one of my most informative days ever on the internet. Thanks NL Gassert … I think. LOL I guess if you’re an rosebud model bleaching might be beneficial to your career.
Nadja
If you follow this blog you will soon figure out that I post on topics about which we (men and women) have lots of questions, ranging from the “G” Spot (where to find it, if it exists), to tying off condoms in gay sex (do gay men really tie them off as indicated in a lot of M/M books?). This post is relatively mild *g*
OK Anal bleaching – how does that work again? 🙂 Your partner who may be turned off by a dark hole, instead gets to see a nice sparkling pink one? What if you’re really dark all over like me and suddenly you have this nice pink aperture? (I’m laughing hysterically). I have learned so much from my blogger friends.
Tam
First things first. What are you doing in France? Second, why do you know so much about penis enlargement?
Btw I checked out that site and I can’t believe what they charge for a “combo” procedure (penis lengthening and thickening) – $8,500. What if something goes wrong during surgery and it stops working altogether?
One of the things I love about this blog is the amount of new information I learn from you guys. You rock!
November 27, 2008 1:23 PM
I’m here on business and heading home tomorrow. A long 17 hour journey, but I’ll be glad to be home, even if I didn’t get to test the researchers’ theory about French men. 😉 I guess I haven’t left yet. LOL
As for the second part? Well, I have a vast store of completely useless and usually slightly perverse knowledge in my brain.
Tam
You still have 24 hours to test the theory about Frenchmen.
I have a vast store of completely useless and usually slightly perverse knowledge in my brain.
I would love just an hour inside your brain *g*
Jeez, I hate hearing about spas and doctors encouraging this type of thing. Like we need any more reasons to hate our bodies. Hair removal and obsessive compulsive hygiene aren’t enough…and now we’re supposed to have liposuction and facelifts on our nether regions? That’s so sad. I feel so sorry for our daughters.
BTW, “Candi Cooter” is the pseudonym I’ve chosen for when I become a famous author of erotica. 😉
Hey Jen
“Candi Cooter”? Is there a special meaning to the name?
I only thought you gurls should know about these new surgical procedures that are available but I’m not sure that face lift is the correct terminology! *g*
Bwahahahaha….
JL
This is the first time that I have rendered you speechless! *g* I love it.
Which was it – The anal bleaching? The penis lengthening and thickening? Or the va jay jay makeover?
Love you too :DDD
ROFLMAO
OMG, Wave, you slay me. What a topic. I probably shouldn’t have read it after eating too much Thanksgiving dinner though 😀 I almost lost it completely, the comments killed me!!!
Lily
Hello Lily
You are such a smart woman and you have been logging on to my blog long enough to know when to check out my posts (or not). *g*
The comments are priceless – they are WAY better than the post. Happy Thanksgiving. Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow for my Thanksgiving Friday guys, complete with turkey dinner :DD
Was there dew on the petals? What about the little clit in the flower? I searched a long time for something that even came close (other than the color)
Muahahaha! Great pic choice for the topic :-DDDD I dont have much to add to the discussion excet to say no way in hell would I ever pay to give a facelif to my nether parts. Hell, I’d buy myself a pair of boobs long before that. But I wouldn’t pay for those either, because it’s several years’ worth of books supplies :-DDD
Hi Mary
Glad you liked the flower *g*
Isn’t it amazing the lengths that women (and men) will go to “improve” on nature? The moral of this post is – no Brazilian! *g* Weren’t the comments priceless? I never heard about some of this stuff (anal bleaching??)
Lol. I’d heard about the others, but the anal bleaching was new to me too. Geez, what has the world come to? I’m not even sure having my teeth whitened would be worth it…
D’you think we’ll ever get to see that in an M/M book? Eager guy tells his boyfriend he has a surprise, stretches naked on his back, pulls his feet toward his head and says in a sultry tone, ‘I got my asshole bleached for you, do you like it’??
Oh Mary
I laughed so hard. I have to ask JL if she could introduce anal bleaching in her next book :DDD
*g* Tell JL the book would have to be a comedy. No way in hell can you write that in a book and look serious :-DDDDDD
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